There was a time when photography was my escape and my way to slow down, breathe, and notice the little details that everyone else seemed to miss. The way sunlight filters through leaves, the texture of a flower petal, my kids’ laughter frozen midair. It used to bring me joy. But somewhere along the way, that joy got tangled up in deadlines, client expectations, and the constant pressure of running a business.
When I turned my love of photography into a business, I had the best intentions. I wanted to share what I saw through my lens with others and to be able to give families the kind of timeless memories I cherished for my own. But as the sessions piled up and my calendar filled, something shifted. It became less about the art and more about the hustle. The editing queues, the client revisions, the endless social media grind I quickly realized it wasn't for me and it all began to drain me.
Then COVID hit. Like so many others, I was forced to make hard decisions, and closing my photography business was one of them. At first, I felt like I’d failed, like I was walking away from something that once defined me. But as time passed, I realized that maybe I hadn’t lost photography at all. Maybe I’d just lost sight of what it meant to me in the first place.
This past week I’ve been picking up my camera again however not for clients, not for deadlines, but for myself. I’ve fallen back in love with photographing nature, the small wonders that remind me how beautiful simple moments can be. A dew drop balanced on a blade of grass. The intricate pattern of a butterfly wing. My boys running barefoot through the yard, chasing sunlight and laughter.
I’m learning to appreciate photography again. Quietly, slowly, and without pressure. No schedules, no sales, no expectations. Just me, my camera, and the world around me.
Maybe stepping away was exactly what I needed to find my way back.
Will I ever make it a business again? Probably not. I can't deal with all those stresses again no matter how much I'd like to earn an income with my passion. I am considering however that I might, like years past, simply list my photographs to an online gallery where people can purchase them with control over print size, canvas or photo paper, etc. and me on the sidelines just photographing.
Those decisions can wait for another day. For now I will sit and pray about it. Ask God for direction and wait.
Have you been able to find happiness in your passion again? Tell me about it.
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